Growing up in the US, many of us have very little concept of what spirituality actually is, despite childhood in general being such a unique—and honestly, spiritual—experience.
To start off, what do we even mean when we say a “spiritual” experience? Starting with this fundamental question may give us some clarity on what it means to be more spiritual, and how we can make space for more spirituality within our lives. Spirituality most often comes up in discussions about meaning and purpose, and for many, it is synonymous with the non-material, sacred, religious, or even supernatural. To me, something “spiritual” can simply mean something that feels significant—and what feels significant often feels “otherworldly,” or at the very least, distinct from our common, everyday experience.
If we use this definition, we can take a closer look at what I mean when I say being young is inherently spiritual. When we are young, we are constantly confronted with new and unfamiliar situations. Having a relatively short list of lived experiences means that novelty happens frequently. As we get older, however, the number of situations we have not yet encountered steadily diminishes, until we reach a point where very little surprises us. Consequently, fewer situations register as deeply significant, and we end up having fewer spiritual experiences. I am not saying we cannot have these experiences as we grow older; I am simply pointing out that as life becomes routine, it is easy to fall away from a sense of wonder and connection. This seems to be happening more and more in our society today.
Most commonly, we are introduced to religion during childhood and taught that this is what people mean when they talk about spirituality. Religion is designed to evoke the spiritual or transcendent. Because of that, it is natural to first define our own spirituality through the lens of our religious background. But this can become complicated over time. As we grow, we learn more about organized religion, and it becomes easier to spot inconsistencies in the belief system or feel genuine doubt about what is being presented.
One of the central friction points comes from ancient texts conflicting with modern, well-established scientific understanding. When this happens, we are often presented with an impossible dilemma: Do I choose “belief” in a system that feels flawed, or do I follow the evidence presented in an academic, verifiable, and reproducible way? More and more people are choosing the scientific route. While that choice is neither good nor bad in itself, it often leaves people without any grounding spiritual framework or practice.
The reason I bring this up is that I want to offer another path. If we choose not to follow a specific religious doctrine, but also recognize that science alone doesn't provide all the answers needed to live a deeply meaningful and fulfilling life, what else is there?
Why not define and cultivate our own spiritual paradigm?
With intention and practice, we can begin to bridge the gap between dogma and scientific curiosity. We can find a workable balance between these two seemingly opposite ways of understanding the world. The challenge is that nobody can do this work for us. No one else can examine our beliefs, question our assumptions, or do the internal sorting. It takes time and emotional energy that many of us feel we don't have. Yet, if we are unwilling to engage with life this deeply, we risk getting stuck in one of two extremes: blindly accepting beliefs we don't resonate with, or rejecting the sacred altogether.
So what is the alternative?
I believe the answer lies in our personal, lived pursuit of a spiritual life. Simply asking ourselves the difficult questions, and then observing the world around us with curious awareness, provides all the data we need. We only need to pay attention to notice the patterns.
Our brains are quite literally pattern detectors. We are reminded of this every time we look up at the clouds and immediately spot shapes, faces, and stories in a random collection of water vapor and wind. In that same way, we are capable of observing patterns in how life unfolds, learning why things work the way they do through patient, grounded awareness.
How to begin?
We start by setting an intention—approaching our lives with an open, curious mind. We notice the principles or tenets that emerge, and we evaluate for ourselves whether they feel true. Ask the honest question, and then step back and observe without judgment or rigid expectations. You may even discover reliable, reassuring patterns that can guide you through your most difficult struggles.
You do not need to inherit spirituality from a book, a preacher, or a guru. We can witness the profound right here, right now, through our direct experience of it. We only have to remain open to the possibility.
Do you need religion to be spiritual? Absolutely not.
Do you need to reject science to be spiritual? Not at all.
If we truly open our minds to the infinite possibilities that exist within our universe, spirituality will find us. Open your mind, open your heart, and just wait. The universe will take care of the rest.
Interested in finding your own path towards a more spiritual and grounded life? Use the button below to send me a message.
